I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
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