Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Randomize
