It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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