i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
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