How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
