There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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