She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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