There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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