How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
