We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
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My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
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