we have pet lesbian snakes
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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