I wanna passion pit in your ass
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Randomize
