It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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