I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
