For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
