I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
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