yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize