Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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