How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
i can juggle bunnies
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today