She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
