i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
