I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize