Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.