Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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