pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Randomize
