Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
