420 ftw
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
