i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
