Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize
