My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
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