If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Randomize
