More tranny stories later!
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
