i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
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