Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
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