Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
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