Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
