I think I just saw someone hide a body.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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