You're completely useless in the revolution.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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