We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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