you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
