The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I need to align my fucking chakras
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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