you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
