KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
