nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
