have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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