How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
