Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
