Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
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