things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
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