Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize