Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
