windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
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Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
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He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration